When reality bites
The last couple of weeks have been tough, we've had coughs, colds (all of us) and teething (just Rose) and everything that comes with those and I am happy to say we now seem to be coming out the other side and I have finally sat down and written this blog that has been going around and around in my head for weeks.
I seem to worry constantly about Rose's weight gain (despite her being lovely and chubby) and her nappies weren't as wet for a few hours this week and I went in to full military mode until they were back up to a weight I was happy with, don't mess with me and the wee! I don't know how I have had the energy to get through some of the recent days and feed Rosie sometimes 8 or 9 times in the day, as well as remembering to feed myself, but you know what you find it somewhere.
Rosie summing it up here, I ate that soup in the background cold and at speed whilst I held her hand because she cried if I didn't:
I am so tired, I don't think I will ever have enough sleep, if you said to me now 'go have a sleep, for one, eleven, forty hours' how ever long it was I don't think it would be enough, but that's ok, because when I am awake there is a lovely smiling face ready to remind me why being a mum and tired for the rest of my life is totally worth it.
I find myself constantly saying to my mum - I have no idea how you did it?! I have three siblings and my mum already has 6 grandchildren and I am not joking when I say she made it look easy. Now when I think of everything she must have gone through with us, constantly putting herself at the bottom of the pile I cannot believe how hardcore she is! My mum is a legend and when things have got tough since Rosie arrived she swoops in from Devon (when I tell Rose I say 'we're bringing in the big guns, Nana is coming!) and everyone breathes a sigh of relief. I sometimes worry that it means I'm not learning to do all the hard stuff myself but then I constantly see things that say 'it takes a village', 'always ask for help' etc and so I call my mum and she comes and helps and I get extra sleep, cups of tea, hugs and the washing actually moves from where I've left it for who knows how long - bliss!
With mum being here Liam and I decided to abandon the sick house and ease our cabin fever last night and go to the cinema, I went knowing that I may fall asleep but I was happy to pay a small fortune to sit in the dark, stare straight ahead and have no one need anything from me for 2 hours, it was great, and as always I missed Rosie and couldn't wait to come home, it was a great feeling!
Shout outs to some wonderful people who were the light in last week:
And of course always wonderful little Rosie, who belly laughs when I dance around like a mad thing, will listen to my highly unusual animal suggestions for Old McDonald has a farm (who has a lion, owl and mummies in my version), who chatters at the top of her voice and smiles through the snot, puke and sore gums like a wonderful little super trooper.
Rose is now 19 weeks old, and f I had a pound for every time someone has said "it goes so fast" I would be a very rich woman, but you know what, it does go so fast! I look at Rose thriving every day and I feel like I'm torn between wanting to shout "grow!" and simultaneously "don't grow!"
As I say we're coming out the other side of this tricky time, the teething isn't going to stop but we can cope when Liam and I are feeling closer to 100% and it isn't combined with snot puke - who knew that was such a thing, I called the doctor in a total panic!
This week brings Christmas trees, fairy lights, carols and mince pies and I know Rosie and I are going to love every minute. I've missed my NCT pals and I can't wait to see them this week and see how much their bubbas have grown and catch up on everything that has been happening, we are all in this horrible teething phase and we all need the moral support and cake that a meet up brings.
If you're having a tough time I hope you have friends and family to support you and that you know you can ask for help, being a mum is really hard and sometimes we all need a hug and a time out before going back in the deep end.
Mums you are hardcore and I salute you!
I seem to worry constantly about Rose's weight gain (despite her being lovely and chubby) and her nappies weren't as wet for a few hours this week and I went in to full military mode until they were back up to a weight I was happy with, don't mess with me and the wee! I don't know how I have had the energy to get through some of the recent days and feed Rosie sometimes 8 or 9 times in the day, as well as remembering to feed myself, but you know what you find it somewhere.
Rosie summing it up here, I ate that soup in the background cold and at speed whilst I held her hand because she cried if I didn't:
I am so tired, I don't think I will ever have enough sleep, if you said to me now 'go have a sleep, for one, eleven, forty hours' how ever long it was I don't think it would be enough, but that's ok, because when I am awake there is a lovely smiling face ready to remind me why being a mum and tired for the rest of my life is totally worth it.
I find myself constantly saying to my mum - I have no idea how you did it?! I have three siblings and my mum already has 6 grandchildren and I am not joking when I say she made it look easy. Now when I think of everything she must have gone through with us, constantly putting herself at the bottom of the pile I cannot believe how hardcore she is! My mum is a legend and when things have got tough since Rosie arrived she swoops in from Devon (when I tell Rose I say 'we're bringing in the big guns, Nana is coming!) and everyone breathes a sigh of relief. I sometimes worry that it means I'm not learning to do all the hard stuff myself but then I constantly see things that say 'it takes a village', 'always ask for help' etc and so I call my mum and she comes and helps and I get extra sleep, cups of tea, hugs and the washing actually moves from where I've left it for who knows how long - bliss!
With mum being here Liam and I decided to abandon the sick house and ease our cabin fever last night and go to the cinema, I went knowing that I may fall asleep but I was happy to pay a small fortune to sit in the dark, stare straight ahead and have no one need anything from me for 2 hours, it was great, and as always I missed Rosie and couldn't wait to come home, it was a great feeling!
Shout outs to some wonderful people who were the light in last week:
- Mel who came and gave me a massage to help my poor tired body feel more human again
- Caroline who came with wise words and soup and even made the soup for us whilst I sat on a stool and tried to remember where we keep the bowls
- Louise who walked in and started washing up (I love you)
- Lowri from Little Maldod, who made me realise I hadn't laughed in too long when I discovered the unbelievably wonderful book 'Animals a plenty one to twenty' - I'm still laughing now thinking about it (racoons holding the baboons balloons!!!!)
And of course always wonderful little Rosie, who belly laughs when I dance around like a mad thing, will listen to my highly unusual animal suggestions for Old McDonald has a farm (who has a lion, owl and mummies in my version), who chatters at the top of her voice and smiles through the snot, puke and sore gums like a wonderful little super trooper.
Rose is now 19 weeks old, and f I had a pound for every time someone has said "it goes so fast" I would be a very rich woman, but you know what, it does go so fast! I look at Rose thriving every day and I feel like I'm torn between wanting to shout "grow!" and simultaneously "don't grow!"
As I say we're coming out the other side of this tricky time, the teething isn't going to stop but we can cope when Liam and I are feeling closer to 100% and it isn't combined with snot puke - who knew that was such a thing, I called the doctor in a total panic!
This week brings Christmas trees, fairy lights, carols and mince pies and I know Rosie and I are going to love every minute. I've missed my NCT pals and I can't wait to see them this week and see how much their bubbas have grown and catch up on everything that has been happening, we are all in this horrible teething phase and we all need the moral support and cake that a meet up brings.
If you're having a tough time I hope you have friends and family to support you and that you know you can ask for help, being a mum is really hard and sometimes we all need a hug and a time out before going back in the deep end.
Mums you are hardcore and I salute you!
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